I have nothing to blog about. I know I made promises to blog more often but every time I get on here to write I have nothing to say. No profound advice no funny stories no book to review (not that I am not reading just nothing new to talk about). I wish I had something because then I realized that I had nothing to write I then got panicked that I was boring. That my life had officially hit a blah spot, an every day mundane blah spot.
We got the kitchen most of the way done, we got the laundry room and bathroom most of the way done, not 100% finished which really kind of make me sad that we just cannot finish it. I bought new lamps they look great in my living room but that is not in the least bit exciting. We have to buy another car, Jerry got a new job, which he adores, but he works day and for the time being he is using Dustin's truck. Dustin still does not have a job so it all works out. Except that the heater core is broken and Jerry is practically freezing to death at 5:30 am when he leaves for work and he does not want to do it for much longer. My family wants to go on a cruise in January for Christmas, but Jerry and I really wanted to do our wedding next year and I have no idea how people would be to afford 2 cruises in one year with everything else that is going on. Part of me (with all the advice we have been given) thinks I should not worry about it and go forward with our plan at hand, we have waited long enough, but then what would my wedding be if none of my immediate family could attend. Jerry and I decided last year when we did taxes to fix the house up first ( again not that we finished) and do the wedding the following year so that babies could be born, people could get their lives in order as well as get houses and jobs and etc. Then we would have the wedding in 2013. As well as the fact that we really wanted a spring date but realized that that maybe to difficult to do so lets go ahead and do the fall and embrace it. But now I feel like that is all going to fall apart yet again and I will never get to have a wedding day. And if one more person tells me just to go to the court house and then have a party I WILL SCREAM! Funny that I should not get the wedding I want because???? I am over that conversation. We will save the money we will pay for it all ourselves telling me I do not get my wedding day just adds to depression I have over not having it yet it does not help or make it better. I have waited 30 years to find someone worth marrying, I have made my ways through many of bad apples (most who dated me then married someone else) I love this man and we both want what we want. Ok done with that rant. I was not meaning to hurt or offend anyone just getting things off my chest so to speak....
The dogs are good the cats are good the turtle is good. We are all healthy, and happy. I am slowly but surely losing weight, we are joining the YMCA, I have rediscovered my love for cooking, Jerry adores his new job, he works more than ever before but he adores it. Lots of craziness going on at his new job, hopefully that means he will move up quickly like he wants to. The "big guys" are in today and he went in over an hour early (which means he left the house at 4:30 am) to make sure all of his ducks were in a row to impress them. I hope everything goes well for him today. I am incredibly proud of him and really want the best for him.
I guess I had a lot in my head to write about but I feel like I wake up, clean, take the dogs out, go to work, come home, cook, watch TV, play with animals, talk to Jerry go to bed, then wake up and do it all over again. I have not seen the oceans or the mountains in months. But for now I need to get ready for work....I hope everybody has a great day!
Okay I'm going to try to remember what I wrote or come close.. LOL
ReplyDeleteIf you are waiting for the right time & place for everyone and the stars to align with the moon correctly to plan your wedding, you will be waiting forever. This wedding is yours and should be when it is best for you. Your call alone. (Well Jerry can have a say too I suppose.) With enough notice for people on when YOU decide, the people who want/should/are able to WILL be there.
I say the same thing about your home. I commend you for making practical decisions on attending to things you need to as a homeowner. That being said, there will always be more. Something that needs to be fixed, a vehicle that needs maintenance, events, and people you will feel the need to put first. Those things will happen now, during the planning of your wedding, and after for a lifetime.
When it comes to your wedding it is okay to feel a "selfish." It's YOUR wedding! Give yourself permission to be excited about it and make decisions based on what you want to happen. In the long run, this day will be most important to you & Jerry. If you worry about what everyone will think and feel about YOUR wedding, you are putting your loved ones in a position where you very well could end up resenting them. And that's not who you are.
Ashley, you are such a sweet person. Right now
you should put some of that attention to what you need in your life... and give some of your loved ones the opportunity to send you some of that sweetness you so deserve!
Life is a balancing act that we all struggle with. I wish you all the luck in making these tough choices! You are doing a great job!!
~R~